✨ INBOX: hotel caelum

[icyspicy]

𝖜𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗 🐙✨

summer

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ABOUT ME

Hello! This is very delightful, though I have no idea what I'm doing!

NOTE

Confused by the username? Good.

Message @summer

code | art

BIRTHDAY DIRECTORY QR CODE

NAME: Winter BIRTHDAY: December 21st FAV CAKE FLAVOR: Black Forest WHAT THEY WANT MOST FOR THEIR BIRTHDAY: To have a good time.

Comments

[astarion]

[Anyway, there is a literal, cartoonish poof of smoke. And when it clears, only a pile of Astarion's clothes remains, topped with a rumpled white towel and robe.

Though there's movement underneath it all. And... is that angry squeaking?]

[icyspicy]

[ Astarion really did just doom himself with that little monologue, didn't he? Winter startles, but without knowing what's happening, there's really no way for him to stop it, even if the incantation for Counterspell flies to the tip of his tongue.

Too little too late. ]

... Astarion?

[ Just gonna crouch over these clothes and move them off of whatever is moving and squeaking. ]

[astarion]

[When he removes the pile of garments from the little thing flailing beneath, he finds-

A BAT, POPPING ITS HEAD OUT AND SQUEAKING BLOODY MURDER, ITS WINGS STILL TANGLED IN THE POOFY SLEEVES OF ASTARION'S WHITE SHIRT--

...Yet, somehow in all of that, the tone and timbre of Astarion's voice:]

What in the hells is happening-?!

[icyspicy]

[ HELP. Winter starts again, yanking his hands away when that little furry head pops up. ]

Astarion, is that— [ you? Oh, but it is. It even sounds like him and everything. Winter is trying very, very valiantly not to just burst out laughing, one hand pressed over his mouth. ]

Stop— stop flailing for a moment and let me help you get free.

[astarion]

[The vampire has not yet cottoned on to exactly what’s happening.]

Of course it’s me, what are you— [startled bat squeak] Why are you so big?!

[WINTER IS A GIANT NOW? Why is that so funny? He sees that repressed laugh, which only bolsters his befuddlement.

Until he catches sight of his own limbs: wings, caught in some oversized cloth, and—]

What?! What is this—!!

[More angry bat noises, and a lot more flailing in his own pile of clothes. Sorry Winter. Also don’t look at his underwear.]

[icyspicy]

Astarion!

[ Now he has an extra-flaily bat on his hands help!! ]

For the love of— hold still or you're going to hurt yourself!

[astarion]

[Thankfully, at some point, Astarion is just too caught in his own shirt that he can't really flail much more. It's the worst bat burrito known to man.]

Why am I a bat!

[One more strain against the material, but to no avail, and then he just deflates. Winter will have more than enough time to free him now.]

No, I know why- [for irony] -but why!

[he just wanted a spa day with NO SHENANIGANS]

[icyspicy]

Apparently not all the water in the place is innocuous.

[ Now that Astarion has gotten himself stuck, Winter can work on freeing him a bit easier, fingers working the fabric away from tiny wings. ]

Do you suppose the spa water will turn you back?

[ They should be so lucky, right? ]

[astarion]

[Oh gods this is HUMILIATING.

While Winter works to free him-]

Try it! Splash me! Dunk me in! I don’t want to be stuck like this.

[icyspicy]

Stop. I'm not going to dunk you in while you're tangled in your own clothes.

[ Eventually, though, he does work Astarion free, scooping him up in his palms to bear him over to the edge of the spa proper. ]

Maybe just dip a wing in.

[ Just in case it doesn't work. ]

[astarion]

[Lifted up, it’s almost dizzying, being small enough to be cupped in someone’s palms. Though “small” is relative — for a bit, he’s big enough that his wings drape over Winter’s touch, dangling, as he’s brought to the spa’s edge.

He immediately dips a wing in!

…And waits. Moments pass. An unfortunately, all Astarion is rewarded with is a wet wing.]

Is this— is this all just some cosmic joke.

[Flops down in Winter’s hands, defeated.]

[icyspicy]

[ There's some part of Winter that thought maybe he could take this seriously, but then Astarion has to go and flop. The warlock tries and utterly fails to bite back a laugh. ]

Well, look on the bright side. You're very adorable.

[astarion]

[Astarion pouts, or at least as much as a bat can pout.]

Oh, you think this is funny, don't you? [He heard that laugh, sir!!] If this blasted hotel isn't compelling us to kiss people, or to bite people, then it's making us change shape into something we're not!

I just wanted a spa day, is that so much to ask?

[icyspicy]

[ Astarion is not helping his case for Winter finding him adorable.

Although— ]

Hold on. When were you compelled to bite people?

[astarion]

[His ears flick, and he folds his wings in — one of them is still wet and dripping a little, sorry Winter.

He hadn’t really meant to say that part aloud, but now that it’s out there, there’s no point in denying it.]

Yes… I did. That mistletoe that made everyone aggressive towards each other apparently had no qualms in making me act more like an opportunist. A predator.

[He doesn’t look up at Winter, but his tone is rueful.]

Lucky you didn’t find me in such a state.

[icyspicy]

[ Winter can handle a little water. It’s hard to mind when Astarion has gone from adorably frustrated to rueful in the space of a moment. The warlock frowns. ]

I’m sorry you were made to go through that. Are you alright?

[astarion]

[Is he all right? He should be fine, and so often he rarely feels guilt for causing pain, but it was different this time when it was out of his control — and when they had been friendly faces prior, even if he knew one better than the other.

Can a bat shrug? He will try, though, because adding some manner of flippancy makes this easier to admit:]

I don’t like the way they looked at me. That’s all.

[Eyes full of fear.]

But I'll be fine, darling.

[icyspicy]

No, I imagine not.

[ Like he was a wild animal that needed to be caged, no doubt.

And now Astarion is a literal wild animal flopped in the palms of his hands. The man can't catch a break, can he? ]

Given your current... predicament, what would you like to do now? If the effect is anything like Polymorph, you have about an hour or so before it wears off.

[ If they're lucky. ]

[astarion]

[If they're lucky. Honestly, it feels like a waste of a day already; he can't catch a break.]

Gods, what can I do like this?

[He remembers, dimly, that this is a perk of being a true vampire, the ability to turn into a bat and flit around in the baleful nighttime hours. But at the moment it feels like anything but a "perk."]

I don't know! [He intonation takes on something vaguely... whinging.] If I can't take a dip in the spa, then I'm hungry.

[icyspicy]

You could still take a dip in the spa, to be fair. If you fancy being a wet bat.

[ Which maybe doesn't sound appealing. ]

Hungry for what?

[astarion]

[He does not fancy being a wet bat, thank you. And he does feel a little guilty about upending Winter's expectations to have a nice spa day, too, but... Also, he doesn't want to just sulk by himself somewhere until this stupid curse(?) wears off.

He squeaks. It's a bat-scoff.]

I wonder. Take a guess.

[icyspicy]

[ One dark brow slowly arches. ]

Blood? Is that an option on the breakfast menu I've been missing?

[astarion]

Ha, oh. Yes. Yes, you have been missing it.

[Or rather, Winter has not had a reason to ever ask for it. Despite himself, amusement bleeds back in.]

You need only know where to go, and simply ask. Do you recall the "Halloween" floor we visited? And the few drinks we shared while we were there?

[icyspicy]

[ On the one hand, it's something of a relief to know that Astarion hasn't had to go around chomping on people to survive. On the other, it's kind of funny. ]

Ha! Have you been asking for Bloody Marys with real blood in them all this time?

[astarion]

Well. Not while we were sitting there drinking, no. I wasn't feeling quite that bold.

[Though the recent vampire revelation gives more context regarding why he had reacted so poignantly, seeing Winter mimic his own appearance back at him.]

But after we parted? I learned they, indeed, serve actual blood. And then I went poking around a bit more to learn that several other establishments in this hotel do, too. Why, I practically need only ask, and the stuff is handed to me.

And that's right -- even for breakfast.